Make Up, Break Up, Hotel or Lavatory - Repost
Your favourite kind of fucking?
Abe postulated that hotel sex was the third best kind. And although my weekend wasn’t as busy as Naut’s - I did find some time to do a little research.
I’m partial to restaurant lavatories. In particular, the better dining establishments around town that have powder rooms. They’re generally not too busy - mainly because they have an elderly clientele where the women are either starving themselves to death in order to remain Mr Big-Bucks final, rather than first wife, or they have colostomy bags.
“Why restaurant toilets?” you may well ask. Well as I’ve aged, I’ve moved on from nightclub toilets- matured, is I suppose, the word for it - I prefer the slower pace of a dining emporium’s facilities.
So grab yourself a blonde, club hopping girl. They’re used to fucking in the dunnies of dance clubs - so they’ll feel right at home in a restaurant lav.
Head to the ladies
Prop a chair up behind the door, so that when it is pushed against, it catches the handle.
Sorry about the photos - they were action shots! I only had so much time dear reader.
Grab your better half (or someone else’s better half for that matter) and get to work!
Once you’ve done your dash, so to speak, the astute move is to walk her back to the dining room; then excuse yourself with the phrase “Excuse me for a moment, I left a surprise for you at reception I’ll be right back”. Then catch a taxi home. She certainly will be surprised when she asks for you at reception!
Or you can lame out like I did on Saturday and head back to hers for a binge drinking, drug fuelled session of mammoth proportions.
You can see from the photo below, that she has the right idea in mind!
Ain’t love grand!
By the time I finally dragged my bedraggled carcass home in the wee hours of Sunday morning, I had only one concern - that I didn’t wake up in a pool of my own piss. It is difficult being this classy!
NB - The original post had actual photo’s from the dunny - but it is too hard to transfer them all here.
Have a great weekend all!
Lermontov
You would have loved my friend Kirsi.
Comment by blackbird — January 30, 2010 @ 2:11 pm
its dunny girl
Comment by fakebrunette — January 30, 2010 @ 5:32 pm
HA! Lem and Kirsi–God in heaven, wouldn’t they be a match???
BTW, I laughed out loud at the “surprise” at reception. And, I am really, really glad I never went out with you.
Comment by evilfury — January 30, 2010 @ 11:03 pm
That’s our boy!
Comment by doanli — January 31, 2010 @ 2:10 am
You’ll never pull this off in Sin City, the women down there are too classy.
Who the fuck am I kidding. You’ll be wading in it. Good luck to you sir.
Comment by Dr Yobbo — January 31, 2010 @ 12:32 pm
Kirsi was the female version of Lem.
Comment by blackbird — January 31, 2010 @ 12:54 pm
BB - more than likely!
Res - yah yah
EF - the tyranny of distance!
D - i try
DrY - I’m yet to go full feral on the ladies(!) of Syd - hopefully the opportunity is not too far away!
BB - she must be a champion then! And a modest one too!
Comment by lermontovwithacapitall — February 1, 2010 @ 6:49 pm
This one looks like Sarah Jessica Parker, btw! (runs and hides)
Comment by doanli — February 1, 2010 @ 11:12 pm
one thing I can always count on in the world is coming to this page and never being shocked by displays of decency.lol.
Comment by tamale — February 2, 2010 @ 8:38 am
I also keep hearing the words to a song whose refrain goes “That’s what Love is all about!”
Comment by doanli — February 3, 2010 @ 3:00 am
Ha! You would probably walk out past reception, catch the eye of the chick manning it and then toilet girl would be REALLY surprised when she wanders out.
Comment by Nautilus — February 17, 2010 @ 8:01 pm