Welcome to Keep Connected Live!
I have not even heard of Channel Zero. I got through The Cabin in the Woods with minimal mental scarring, so I got that going for me (of course, there was the promise of fun times afterward so now I'll probably have a weird sex association with it, lol). Glad you made it through the week and that you're feeling better! I LOVE YOU!
I remember being 5 years and 51 weeks old, and my older brother, who was 8 years old at the time, would torment me with his marshmallow shooter. I would beg to play with it, and he would laugh at me, waving it at me as I cried. Then, 1 week later, I turned 6, and I rejoiced for I was finally old enough to play with a marshmallow shooter. Mine came in the mail from Amazon. I opened the box, took it out and immediately ran to my brother. Sadly, though, it was exactly 4 months and a day from his 8th birthday. He sat on his bed, listening to Led Zeppelin IV, smoking a cigarette, and drinking a beer. He looked at me through his mirrored sunglasses and said, "sorry kid, that's kid's stuff. I'm way too old to play with that. Now scram, will ya'?"
When my FIL was living he liked target shooting whenever we went to his family's ranch in southern Georgia. He made the mistake of asking my MIL and I to go get him some marshmallows to use for target practice, so we got mini-marshmallows to piss him off. We WANTED to get those teeny-tiny marshmallows like the ones in hot cocoa mix, but couldn't find them.
My next door neighbor had an oak identical to ours, but they cut it down 2 years ago. The house on the other side of them also have one. So each fall, half my leaves and half of that other house's leaves drop enough oak leaves on the guy in the middle so that it looks like he still has an oak. It's OK though, he lets his dog shit on our lawn, so fuck him.